My flesh in needled claws I am pulled back. Back to the place where I cannot savour the embers of this spider silk night. And I beg. Here. I beg. I beg. My fingers wound desperate through the ringlets of this sweet darling. This ancient. This taste of totem that catches raw in my throat. This fire in inured company. This unheeded loss. This home. This. And I am scattered. Itinerant on the earth of darker ages. I bathe in harlequin lakes, speckled gold with the goblin cries of those hollow hills. And I howl with them. Maelstrom thoughts spew out the tortures of another landscape. And I beg. I beg. Drag me. Beat me. Scour this belonging from my mind. Exile me. Hate me, when all I want is here. Here. I fall, here. I lie, here. I am, here. Here. And still, in all my piteous hope, I cannot hold back the day. I watch in salted ruin as the sun splinters along that dark horizon. And I rise with it. And I run. Blinded by circles of rain that would drive me back into the arms of this narrated blood. I run. Blinded. Blind. Hounded by ten thousand stupid reasons to leave. And no reason to stay.

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30 thoughts on “Home 

  1. Creativity, in any form is the same, you grow, your skills become sharper, and anyway, if this was all you could do, for the rest of time, it’s wouldn’t be a bad thing at all 👍

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  2. Thanks Ash, it feels chaotic and savage when it’s being written. I’m not sure it will ever fit into anything commercial, but that’s what’s so great about this place. We can let the beast out of the cage.

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  3. Have you listens to much Tangerine Dream’s stuff? I find they can be very inspiration, but of course you need to find the right track, because some can be fucking tiresome.

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  4. They have a lot of music that is worthy to help you get in the mood, like Goblin, who are worth listening to for good, gravelly horror, guess that’s why Dario Argento used them on most of his movies.

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  5. If, like one of your comments states, “this prose stuff is all I can write” I don’t reckon it’s too much of a problem. Atmospheric and interesting to read – really enjoyed it (and now I have the added bonus of seeking out tangerine dream and goblin for some late night reflection and scrawling!)

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  6. Thanks Nik, I also love he process of writing it, I think that’s the trouble. Going back to mainstream feels dull and two dimensional, perhaps there’s a middle ground emerging?
    Enjoy Tangerine Dream & Goblin 🎶

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  7. Haha, so they say. I’ve managed to get my sensible head in gear and write a synopsis today, I ended up using a grid I found online. It worked pretty well for a formulaic kind of thing. The flouncy bit of me is sulking. It’s like having two kids.

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  8. I think that’s the scariest bit about writing for me – the thought that I may have to do something grown-up on behalf of my ramblings… Flouncy will get over it – never fear 🙂

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  9. Wow, thank you so much, that’s such a sweet thing. It may take me a while as I have a couple of others waiting in the wings, but I love spreading the word about other bloggers so I will get around to it ❤️

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